Products We Probably Don’t Need
The Chop Stir:
Although I suppose “in a fraction of the time” is a step better than “a fraction of the time,” but really, I’ve never a) considered the process of chopping up ground beef in a pan to be overly time consuming; nor b) wished I had something other than a wooden spoon with which to accomplish the task.
A one-year emergency supply of freeze-dried and dehydrated food, sufficient to meet the sustenance needs of a family of four:
Perfect for your very own backyard bomb shelter. Add it to your store of plastic sheeting and duct tape….
November 24th, 2010 at 12:38 pm
I agree about the chop stir. Instead of having meat flying in two directions when I try to chop it up in the pan, it will now make a nice four directional splatter pattern.
As for the canned meals, they’re a lot more common than you think. When I moved into my apartment in NYC I was given a booklet from the management company that was basically “Panic! Terrorist Attack Survival Handbook”. It contained instructions such as making sure I had plastic sheeting to cover my windows in the event of a dirty bomb, phone numbers for places were I could order lead sheeting, and a recommendation that I procure canned food and water for at least one month of survival for all family members. No guidance was provided on where I was supposed to store these items in the tiny apartment.
November 26th, 2010 at 1:25 am
^^ can you imagine if everybody in the building put lead sheeting in their windows and stocked their kitchens with a month’s worth of canned food? The building would collapse under its own weight: terrorists win.
Anyway, remember the Egg Wave? In my mind, that was the most worthless kitchen gadget ever advertised. “Tired of the mess?!” …do you mean having to wash a spatula and pan every time I cook an egg? “Tired of waiting?!” …do you mean waiting a couple minutes (while I do other things) for an egg to cook on the stove? Despite the great acting in the commercial (damn, she really loves those scrambled eggs!), I never did see how cooking an egg in the microwave (which still takes time), in a plastic cup (which you still have to wash) would change my life.
Still don’t own one. I’ve considered giving one as an ironic gift, but, like the Snuggy people, I don’t want to encourage them further with my money.
December 3rd, 2010 at 2:21 pm
That reminds me of my square egg maker I inherited from my grandfather. Still haven’t used it, though it collects dust in my kitchen as we speak. It will compress a hard-cooked egg into a perfect cube.
Presumably, a cubic egg would make the egg a better fit for tea sandwiches? Otherwise, I don’t really know.
December 6th, 2010 at 2:45 am
Are you kidding?!? I would love cubic eggs- how bad ass is that? What purpose…perhaps for stacking in the back of a pickup truck- isn’t that what the Japanese did with watermelons?